Research shows that approximately 87% of the things we say to
ourselves about ourselves are negative, self-destructive, and
undermining. This negative self-talk leads to a self-fulfilling
prophecy - what we tell ourselves creates a mindset which
makes our self talk come true. Optimists know that -
sometimes, people know it naturally on a subconscious level
and seldom need positive self-talk ; other times, people
become optimists through deliberately practicing positive self-
talk.
Negative self talk increase your unhappiness and
incompetence. It can make you unhealthy and self-destructive.
Fortunately, positive self talk can do just the opposite - it can
make you healthier, happier, more confident, and more
competent.
Realistic, practical optimism is a choice you can make on
purpose to help you manage your life successfully. There is a
set of characteristics that most optimists have in common, but
through use of certain strategies naturally used by optimists,
pessimists can turn themselves into optimists.
Realistic, practical optimism is not
• A denial of reality
• Masking over problems
• Pointless hoping
• Pollyanna thinking
• "See-no-evil, hear-no-evil" thinking
• A panacea.
It is
• A system for confronting problems
• A way to choose the best outcomes
• A method for coping with any challenges
• A happier, healthier approach to life.
Each one of us has a unique set of experiences in life that
gives us a model of the world that includes our interests, likes
and dislikes, values, and emotional tendencies. We are all born
with coping abilities which change as we interact with the
world. As we grow up, our coping skills can become weaker or
stronger and we can become more positive or negative in our
attitude.
At one time psychiatrists believed that we react to life's
stresses by avoiding, repressing, or denying them. Now we
know that all of us are born with the potential to manage
stress, but not all people make the most of that potential.
To be human means that we can change our habits and our
patterns of behavior. We can identify what makes us cope
successfully and the things that impede that. We can analyze
our own approach to life and challenge and replace our less
successful coping methods.
